he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize