yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
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Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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