I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
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