Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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