yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize