yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize