can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
