I just cut my nipple shaving
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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