2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Oh god it's open bar.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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