no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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