his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
zippers are such a cool invention
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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