My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Randomize
