she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I've got a whole match.com system. Triple book. First dates always get the 6pm happy hour drinks slot. 8pm dinner goes to a girl where I think I can close the deal. 10pm slot goes to the sure thing in case of emergency, but 6 can always trump 8 and 8 always trumps 10. Just blame it on a dead iPhone battery.
That, my friend, is how I bang 50 new girls a year. Not luck at all. It's science and statistics.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize