Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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