Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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