We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
