I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
