I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
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