My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
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