it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
