You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Randomize