I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Randomize
