i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize