you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
