I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I want a musical about memes.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
