We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Randomize
