I got chris browned last night
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
