Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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