Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
