Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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