I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
