I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
