belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
