It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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