Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
