More tranny stories later!
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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