never play flip cup with pint glasses
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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