so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize