would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
