he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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