people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
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Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
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Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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