U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
