I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Randomize
