talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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