You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
