and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
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Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
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I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us