next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Do vagina's smell?
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
