whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
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