In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
