Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
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