Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
